Sunday, May 20, 2012

A Surgery, an Anesthesia & a will

I have to get a surgery tomorrow to cut off the gallbladder from my body. First surgery for me ! So, I was a bit stressed out and I wondered how to deal with that.

The first idea which popped up in my (sick ?)mind was writing down a will. No kidding ! I almost did it ! But the most amazing idea was to clean up my whole apartment in case of people coming around to make packed all up if I die. Most certainly, my parents would do the boxes and I don’t want them to discover who I am… Not that they don’t know me, but I am sure that they don’t even imagine some details I am not keen on to let them know… Privacy, you name it !

Then, about that will, I was thinking about the right person to put as referent. My best friend Carol is most likely the one person I truly trust to accept my will and make it real (and the closest friend by miles too !). Of course, she'd need all my code access to emails, websites and cell phone. In addition to that, I'd need to point out whom I am going to contact in case of sudden death and whom I don’t want to. My facebook & twitter accesses too would be required in that will.

Gosh, I didn’t think about that before the surgeon told me the date and said “anesthesia is a piece of cake, my dear !” ;  I was like “Hello ?”. Then, he told me that “nothing bad happens whilst a gallbladder surgery… and I heard a “you know, everything can happen !”. it stressed me out even more ! I went off his office and while I was walking back to mine, I had one single idea in mind “What am I going to do if I die ?”.
Basically, this is a stupid thought because I won’t know I am dead. I would be dead . Final point. Nada. End of the story. But as I am quite a control freak sometimes, I won’t tolerate my parents, siblings, friends and relatives not to be able to do my last will accurately.

So, the choice of my best friend was obvious. She knows how much I care about my books, my Krissy & Niki collection, my blur cds, my photos, my websites and all those little things I like or worship. She knows that I would be highly glad her to run my Saint Martial family house with my siblings, Alex & Romain and keep on loving it. I could let this house to my siblings but they are too young to carry that cross of heritage yet. Theyboth have to make their lives first. Carol would let that home back to them at the end of her own life.

But, if I even survive to the surgery (let’s see… I have a large probability of surviving after checking medical websites ! I am such a pain in the arse that God might not want me right now...), I have to stay at home for three weeks, not moving, not doing my gym or even running all over the place. Yet, I have to seat down on the sofa (or a chair, or on the bed), doing nothing but resting ! Help me God !

Some people even told me (from own experiences) that I would be so tired and sleepy that I shall stay lying all day long for about 6/7 days… and then, real pain is quite real.

Hello ?

The second idea which popped up in my (sick again ?) mind was : What the hell am I going to do for 3 long weeks at home without going out ?

      TV ?  As I mainly like boring shows late at night, which I won’t be able to watch to because of the effect of anesthesia for a few days more… I didn't count on TV to entertain my long days at home ! But I realized lately that French Tennis Open would be on air... Huuuummm.... Lovely boys on TV ? Interesting enough to keep me awake !

       Reading ?   I am not going to read for 10 hours straight and it is going to be so expensive to read a book a day for 21 days !! But already have a few waiting…and those 4 I do want to read again !

-       Photographing  ? What the point in that ?... Photographing what ? The sofa ? My stitches ?

          Crocheting  ? Oh, God, I could not even walk, so I am not going to crochet !

          Music ? Loud ?  Hopefully Blur & Arctic Monkeys exist… Gonna save my days… I would have enough time to listen all the albums, and re-discover some treasures I have (Hello Johnny Cash !!)…

Calling my friends ?  Almost certainly they shall be at work, so not available… Awesome :(  !

Sleeping ?  Why not ? I could save many extra hours to be sure not to sleep in London august 12th when waiting for Blur gig for Olympics closing ceremony (I doubt I would ever fall asleep whilst listening to blur tho’)

Writing ? Yeah, Yeah !! I have my latest book to finish to write, a few reviews to do for Lords of Rock and a lot of blog papers to write.... Hurray !!! Hurray !! I am going to WRITE !!!

Eating ? Just forget it ! Strict diet after surgery and for a couple of months… So cucumber, carrots, ham and yogurt. How fun !  I would have the support of the fridge doors anyway !


So, I still don’t know what I am going to do…

Obviously, I shall be in little pain for a few days, not able to walk around and do much effort and be sleepy all the time…  I checked out the WiFi connection on my balcony yesterday and it works … Should keep you posted, but I don’t know whenever I could write… (I just scheduled  afew episods of "Lisa at work"... because some asked me the "following episod about Lisa and the "stranger")...

So, if you don’t read any post (I am ALIVE !!) after may 31st, you would understand the reason why… I am not a blogger anymore, I am dead. OOOPS ! (LOL)